#24. Kalea Renee-Exploring Humboldt County: A Personal Journey through its Beauty and Complexity

Scott Hammond: Welcome, Kalea Renee, to 100% Humboldt. Glad to have you. Hello.

Kalea Renee: Thank you so much for having me on. Very excited to be here.

Scott Hammond: I'm glad to be here with you. It's a beautiful night in Medford, Oregon,

Scott Hammond: and warmer than it is- I would say it's balmy … balmy. [laughs] Warmer than it is daytime in Humboldt. [laughs] Uh, can confirm. Yeah. The thing that I found frustrating

Kalea Renee: away, uh, I think just over 12, gosh, almost 13 years ago now, the weather in Humboldt, I th- I remember it being close to th- it was always about 330 days of fog. Wow. And the other 35 were varying levels of pale, pallid sunlight. [laughs] Wow. When the high was 72 for most of my life. But today- Then I moved away, it started getting, getting hot.

Scott Hammond: Amazing, yeah. You guys have beautiful summers now. Apparently. [laughs] So yeah, we are the envy of Redding. When it's 117 there, we are 65 and breezy. This is true. So when you think about Humboldt and being born and bred and raised 100% Humboldt- Mm … what do you think about and what, What emotions are evoked in you as you've, uh, been one of many who've, uh, left the area for a variety of reasons?

Kalea Renee: Yeah. Um, what I remember… Actually, one of the things I realize that's most special about Humboldt that I realized when I moved away was, um, every time driving back from Southern of, of highway. Uh, it's called the 199, and it's this winding freeway through redwood trees. And it's pretty, but, you know- S- … I'm like, "These are just big old trees." moved away, I would see cars stopped. And I would see people just pulled off on the side of the road- Mm … with their cameras just staring up in awe and wonderment. Yeah. And I thought, "What the fuck are you doing?" Can I swear on this Is that allowed? Or do we not do that? I can, I can edit it out.

Scott Hammond: I think you just did, but- Well… No, we're R-rated. [laughs] We wanna stay that way. [laughs] This one means you have to press

Kalea Renee: there's explicit content in this podcast when you- No, Highway 199 …

Scott Hammond: upload to Pod- Beautiful. Smith River- Yeah … Highway. Um, wild and scenic river, right? Yeah, gorgeous. And, um, yeah, that's th- kind of, uh, it's, it's still North County, but close enough.

Kalea Renee: But the, the thing that, that made me, uh, that it always struck me, or it started to s- to s- struck me a bit more, was the fact that the area… Like, Humboldt County is incredibly beautiful. So I don't know if you know this, Father, but redwood trees grow in only two places in the world. Mm. They grow in Humboldt coast of Japan. Oh. So in order to get these incredible, enormous titans of trees, they require, require really specific conditions. Mm-hmm. So the coastal fog, which I despised because I just don't like gray days, in fact was the reason that all of that incredible… Like, some- there's something about looking up at a really, really old. [laughs] Yeah. An enormous tree that has outlived you and will outlive you once you die. Right. Most likely, unless, you know, you deforest things and act like a jackass, but… No, it's magical, yeah. Yeah.

Scott Hammond: No, some really old trees. You're right. And, and we've… It's funny 'cause w- when you live in near Disneyland, granted- Oh, for sure … if you go.

Kalea Renee: Do, do you ever think about the fact that there are literally millions of who will never in their lifetimes see a redwood tree- Yeah … or camp under a redwood tree?

Scott Hammond: Or the ocean, yeah. Or the ocean, yeah. And, uh- It's a nice sort of like, uh, fist slap in the face of, "Hey, appreciate

Kalea Renee: the, the experiences that you have." Yeah.

Scott Hammond: And then Mom and I on our way home Monday, we'll see Europeans all over Prairie Creek- Oh, yeah … hanging out, talking in different languages, digging the redwoods for the first time.

Kalea Renee: So there's a place, um, near Crescent City in Jedediah Smith State Park that's… It's called, um, Grove of the Titans. Yeah. And it was built, I think, in the last two years, and it's really incredible because it's, it's a couple-mile hike, but they have these raised platforms off the forest floor. Mm. So it has really minimal impact. But these trees, I mean… And I grew up in Humboldt, so I've seen, I've seen some redwoods. Not impressed. But these suckers were- Mm … freaking enormous. Really? I mean, huge. Like, picture the back of four Ford Econoline vans squared together and that being- So you've

Scott Hammond: liked this … the base of a huge tree. You've been up there? Yeah, really incredible. It's on the way home. We're- And so many pe- Like, like you were talking about seeing people

Kalea Renee: people speaking in different languages. Right. I heard German. I heard Russian. I heard Italian. I heard other things I couldn't identify, not English. You are not, uh, from here, and I'm excited that you are here because this is very cool." When you hear Finnish, you'll know that it's, uh- [laughs] …

Scott Hammond: it's, uh, it's kind of like… What are those guys on Star Trek? What is, uh, Worf? He's a, uh- Klingon? Kl- It sounds like Klingon. Oh. It's so weird. It's, it's… Finnish is really weird. Finnish, yeah. Not that I know any. But we digress. [laughs] So what do you remember growing up in Humboldt? What do you, what do you, what are your fondest memories,

Kalea Renee: Top three takeaways. Loved being by the ocean. Uh, very rugged coastline.The idea of being like a California, California girl, like this is a fun, neat idea for people who don't live in the northern part of California. Mm. Because it is incredibly beautiful. But I remember having several birthday parties at Moonstone Beach. Ah. And it was maybe 63 degrees. Maybe it was sunny. Maybe. Maybe not. It was a hot day. Definitely windy. And [laughs] just like bringing friends out, and we'd bring some snacks and picnics. And you'd… If you were very brave, water once because if you were in there for longer than probably a you'd catch hypothermia. [laughs] It's freezing water, yeah. So it was like, "Oh, you grew up by the ocean. Did you, Like, do you hang at the beach all the time?"

Scott Hammond: No, no, we did not." It's Baywatch, baby. [laughs] You walk in jeans- [laughs] …

Kalea Renee: and hefty boots and a sweatshirt most days- Yeah … because it is cold, it is windy. It's beautiful, but it's not a friendly, good swimming coastline. There also are many sharks in a, a number of the different neighboring, uh, waters, so- Yeah … wish I could've been like… I forget that I, I grew up on a coastal town. Well,

Scott Hammond: Because we didn't hang out there. [laughs] Yeah. No, the waves take people every summer. Oh, they sure do.

Kalea Renee: Yeah, the, so folks when you're- We had tsunami warning zones. I remember being in a class- In our county … in Humboldt, like- Oh, getting that tsunami warning, having to bail out.

Scott Hammond: Oh, that happened in '04, was it? I think you, I think you and Mom were in

Kalea Renee: Hawaii at that time. Yeah, and there was a big tsunami in Japan that hit

Scott Hammond: Crescent City. Mm-hmm. And Humboldt, but it, not as bad. Yeah. Yeah, and the sneaker waves just as a… I think that's a really good… We haven't talked about that yet. It, it's a really scary undertow that people- Oh … don't, don't understand, so- Don't mess with the ocean … [laughs] Mom went in after the dad. The son went in after the dad. Oh. And then the daughter almost did. Oh, no. They all died? And everybody died except for the dog. Shit. Somebody tackled the daughter, so this- [laughs] … fabulous family from Arcata. Aw. Three of them died, and they were really loved and well-regarded and they, and they died because of the t- t- 'cause of the undertow. You ha- just a- It's crazy … s- something to remember, anyone listening, never turn your back on the ocean. Just don't do it.

Kalea Renee: It's beautiful, um, but it'll kill you because the ocean is going to ocean. And you might think you're safe, but you could, you could be dead, and you could have your wife dog all dead as well. So besides weather and redwoods- Right …

Scott Hammond: what do you, what do you take away when you sit and reflect on your, your wasted youth? [laughs] Your, your diminished self. A rough time. I mean, I'll be

Kalea Renee: honest, I had, I had something of a unique upbringing for

Kalea Renee: So, um, me and my siblings were all homeschooled. We lived in a relatively rural home for the first 12-ish years of my life. Then we moved into a more kind of suburban But what I remember f- feeling that was an interesting kind of dichotomy about Humboldt is McKinleyville, where we grew up, always seemed more conservative in the sense of it was families raising kids. There was a lot of Mexican food restaurants and car lots. There was a big Kmart.

Kalea Renee: There was that and not a whole lot else. Yeah.

Scott Hammond: Arcata, one town over, 15 minutes away, where the college is

Kalea Renee: located, Humboldt State, now Cal State Poly,

Scott Hammond: Cal Poly Humboldt. Whatever. I never- Everybody, give, we have to correct everyone … I'm gonna say it w- wrong on purpose. Cal Poly Humboldt.

Kalea Renee: Stop email- emailing me and asking me for money because I'm an I didn't go there. Not what you're calling it now. Oh. But other than that, we're fine. But Arcata definitely had a different kind of energy to it. It, I think probably because the fact that there was a college there- Mm-hmm … so you had a lot of different people flowing in and flowing out. It definitely, the Arcata Plaza in particular felt like this idea of the Redwood Curtain, where people are kind of stuck in

Kalea Renee: the '70s.

Kalea Renee: And you really [laughs] … I mean, there's two highways going out of Humboldt Right. Both of which can often experience, uh, fallen trees, uh, landslides, so it is- Snow … snow occasionally. [laughs] So it is, it can be at times pretty cut off from the rest of the state around it. But this more kind of,

Kalea Renee: um, hippie- Time, time capsule … time capsule, hippie vibe. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of dreadlocks, a lot of, uh- Yeah … patchouli, a lot of Hacky Sack playing, a lot of knowing of people who grew a lot of weed but not knowing them myself because I a lot of skunks because we were also pretty conservative Christian also homeschooled, so- Mm … you know, you learn a lot.

Scott Hammond: [laughs] And, and Deanna drove by the plaza, "Do these people all have night jobs?" [laughs] You know- They work at night. Yeah, yeah, Deanna. It was a- That's, yeah, that's right …

Kalea Renee: it was a funny thing going back in the last few years because I, when I was 18 or 19, I moved to Arcata, got my first apartm- apartment with Holly Beechul. Shout out, Holly. Hi, Holly. Uh, Holly St. Charles now.

Kalea Renee: But when I was living there for the four years… Oh, picture. Hello.

Scott Hammond: Stop. Could I have a picture? Yeah, please. There you go.

Kalea Renee: Um, we would, we lived probably four blocks away from so the plaza's the main hub of the, the town in Arcata, which I- It's a square. It's this, it's a square.

Scott Hammond: Sonoma has one. You know, McKinleyville doesn't have one really. No.

Kalea Renee: Arc- uh, Eureka doesn't have one. It's a few different towns.

Scott Hammond: There are a few towns. What is it, Sonoma, uh, California,

Kalea Renee: um- Ashland, Oregon kind of has one, but it's more like a- Yes … a single block. Yeah. Not quite the same. But the Arcata Plaza is pretty cool. Mm-hmm. So on one side, there's basically the bar row. The other side, there's little breakfast cafes, Um, the whole thing is kind of encircled by, by shops one side, there's, there's the liquor store, So I remember walking the four or five blocks, you know, on weekend nights and, you know, going out, having drinks, you know, taking off my high heels with my friends mm, college.Um, but going back 10 years or so

Kalea Renee: later, the, the vibe of the plaza- Yeah … it's, it's sketchier. Like, I remember being panhandled by people or having people ask you for a dollar- Sure … or a cigarette But going back, um, recently or more recently- Way sketchier

Kalea Renee: … way sketchier. Like, people who are aggressively demanding things from And I'm like, "I would like to change sides of the I like to th- I, I like to think that I'm a kind, a kind person person, not judging people on first appearances, three people in a row down the block curse me out for not giving them a dollar or the $5 they demanded, like what, what… H- hang on.

Scott Hammond: This isn't- [laughs] … this doesn't feel very fair. [laughs] I was just trying to walk here, and I'm sorry I don't have $5 for

Kalea Renee: all of you. So, um, yeah, this is, this, this kinda sucks, but I, I don't really know what the answer to

Scott Hammond: So imagine the new homeschool mom with three or four kids trying to navigate the plaza. [laughs] Are you kidding me? [laughs] Yeah. Come on here, bro.

Kalea Renee: Time to go to Samoa. [laughs] Yeah. Go to a beach.

Scott Hammond: No, it's gotten aggressive. [laughs] And it kinda happened a lot in '95, 'cause I was in outside sales in Arcata and McKinleyville, and Arcata got weird after Jerry died. Mm. And it got stranger and, and like a new, um, refugee kinda found its way. Mm. His or her way there. And now it's just, um, it's

Kalea Renee: like the big layover, and we kinda blame trimmigrants are host- you know, hostages and vestiges of, um- Is it true that at some point there was a lot of unhoused people who San Francisco up to Humboldt just to get them the hell out? Yeah, I think that's true. I think, um- I remember that being something swirling around the ether. Well- I don't know if it's accurate or not … Crescent City drops in the folks from Pelican Bay.

Scott Hammond: I think they get a one-way ticket to, uh, Eureka sometimes. Mm. Uh, but yeah, that's kinda rumor. I, I think it's urban legend that's probably know, "Hey, thank you for delivering your best,"

Scott Hammond: um- Right

Scott Hammond: … we love people, but sometimes people are super damaged, sometimes people are, uh, publicly not okay, not, not okay. Yeah, and it's- And it's legal to be crazy … yeah.

Kalea Renee: Well, it's a challenging thing because I on the plaza in Arcata, I worked there for I think a year, maybe a year and a half. Is Yes, in California. Shout out Jitterbean Coffee Company.

Scott Hammond: Jitterbean, you're amazing. Rick Roberts.

Kalea Renee: Honestly, super probably some of the best coffees they've got nice artisanal coffee in southern Oregon, so shout out. Also, the fact that they provide Andes Mints never stop doing that. Really? Yeah. Oh, yeah, they do the mints. Special. And if, and if you have kids drink, you get a little, little sucker, so also exciting. [laughs] Really? But when I was working there, I remember… I was actually just telling someone this Um, there was this woman who, we called her the witch, [laughs] which is someone who self-identifies now in witchy ways. I'm like, "By the way, that wasn't very fair." But she was this woman… We're just gonna pause, and you can edit this out because the very distracting in my storytelling. Go ahead. [laughs] This woman It was this woman who, she was a, a homeless woman who had just really negative, scary energy. I think she was banned from most shops on the plaza. Mm-hmm. Oh, wow.

Kalea Renee: She, she had stabbed at least one person. She had kicked a baby. Oh. Um, like literally kicked a baby in a Uh, and there'd been a few other instances of Really? … assaulting someone. Really? And she would get arrested, and she would get taken to jail, there for one night, and then we would see her again a few days later.

Scott Hammond: And- I remember this. She was crazy. Yeah.

Kalea Renee: She had a really horrifying, scary smell that I couldn't quite

Kalea Renee: It was like sour patchouli and death. Man. Yeah. Oh, how sad. You know, and, and I don't think that, um… I, I would imagine she didn't enjoy being [laughs] Like, there clearly was, uh, if not addiction, definitely mental illness, generally just seem to go. And it's not a Humboldt- or an Arcata-specific problem- No … to have a homeless population that, um,

Kalea Renee: is just… W- what do you do? What do you do? There's… It's, it's such a big, complicated issue. You can say- It's hard … put people in housing, but if people have a- a addiction issues challenges, that's not gonna work. Yeah. They'll be out on the streets probably again soon.

Scott Hammond: I think you touch on something really good, Kalea. The, the fact is, um, these people have names. They're Imago Dei. They're image-bearers of God like you They're human beings, but they've been, um, traumatized, dame- damaged, hurt. Mm-hmm. Um, mental illness, drugs, and- Well, some people…

Kalea Renee: And some people choose, choose to live like that. I'm not saying it's the majority- It's a choice … or a great many people.

Scott Hammond: No, I think it's… I think some people clearly choose to be, choices, and they have names like Pete the Rag Man. I do remember Pete the Rag Man, yeah. He was like…

Kalea Renee: He wore the most raggedy, crazy things and then- And I… What I heard about him, that he had rich parents, and I, a mental illness or if the rumor was that he had some sort of mental illness or if he got heavily into addiction- Yeah … or what that was, but- And Little John that hitchhiked,

Scott Hammond: He would hitchhike back and forth from Arcata to Orick and- Mm … smelled real bad, and he just could gr- he did talk, gr, and he, he couldn't talk, but he, he could grumble. Hm. Yeah. And he was interesting. And then, uh, there's the guy with the big dread. I remember that guy, yeah. There was- He was at Los Bagels a lot. Very nice man.

Kalea Renee: Yeah. There was another guy who used to hang out had a dog, older guy with a gray goatee. He just died, yeah. Oh. Yeah. I remember buying him, like, $50 worth of Subway cards one time ago.

Scott Hammond: Remember Hammy Guide? He was the panhandling guy. He had the station at- He was really nice, really kind. What was his name?

Kalea Renee: He was kind

Scott Hammond: He was killed? Yeah, he was actually murdered, yeah. Oh, shit. Sorry he was murdered. So yeah, these guy- it's, it's a tough life, man. Uh, life on the streets has gotta be just

Scott Hammond: Yeah. And, uh, you know, just, I, we could talk about it all night. There's, there's, there's no answers. Humboldt has its unfair share of just like a lot of, a lot of homeless. Yeah. And a lot of hopeless. Yeah. And Pastor Jim said it well years ago. He said, "This should be Shangri-La. It's the, the, the land of milk and honey. We got rivers, we got bays, we got oceans, we got redwoods." We got oysters, yeah. "We got everything. We got oysters, we got-" We got goats, we got cheese …

Kalea Renee: got weed. Yeah. Yeah, really good weed.

Scott Hammond: And yet there's this ubiquitous unhappiness and craziness. We hold all the records in the state for rape and incest- Oh, boy … and alcoholism and drug abuse and weed and, and meth and, and homeless, and it's like- Damn, Humboldt. [laughs] That's a paradox, dude. There you go.

Kalea Renee: And also known for the best goat cheese in the world. [laughs] The best goat cheese. Shout out Cypress Grove.

Kalea Renee: And weed.

Scott Hammond: Purple Haze. And weed. [laughs] Yeah. Yeah, okay. Fair enough. [laughs] Yeah, so- Yeah … so when you look back, what do you, um, what do you miss? If you could go back in time and recapture or w- what do you … I'm asking two questions. What do you miss, and what would you redo if you could go back in time? You know, I really- I've never asked that question.

Kalea Renee: I like it … that's, yeah, it's a good question.

Scott Hammond: That's Cher, right? Anyway, never mind.

Kalea Renee: If I could turn back time. Yeah, that one. Even if I could. I don't know what that touch was, but-

Scott Hammond: Kalea Renee … her. Music major from Humboldt State. [snorts] So what do you- Yes, this is how I want to be known … what would you redo? [laughs] What would I redo?

Kalea Renee: You know, I don't know that there's much I would redo because I my life that way. Um, I think that the decisions that you make, if you don't take it as the sum of yourself and appreciate what you gained and learned, um, from the choices that you made, I, I think it's, uh, it's just not for me. No judgment on anyone else, but … You know, I wish I'd spent more time at the ocean, [laughs] if I, if I was, if my arm was twisted to say a regret. Because especially for the first- Time at the beach … yeah, 10, 12 years, well, I mean, till 18 I lived nine minutes away from

Kalea Renee: … [laughs] We're all five minutes from the Very close to the bay. There you go. Very many fun activities.

Scott Hammond: When you live by Disneyland- You don't go … you never go.

Kalea Renee: It's true. When you live by the redwoods

Scott Hammond: two weeks to get to- Oh, people travel from across the world … I'm gonna go home and watch Monday Night Football.

Kalea Renee: I'm gonna go watch some Vanderpump Rules because you've seen one redwood tree, you've seen them all.

Kalea Renee: Gratitude.

Scott Hammond: Not, not true. [laughs] What did, what did he say?

Kalea Renee: Gratitude. Gratitude, yeah. No. Check in with the gratitude,

Scott Hammond: and make that effort to go out and, uh, enjoy those things. Oh, no. You know what?

Kalea Renee: I do have a regret. I have a very real regret. What is that? I regret that I did not do more sampling of all of the different OG strains of cannabis that have originated in Humboldt County. Okay. Because I tell you what, again, not discovering, uh, the joys of marijuana for me in particular until probably 2022, what do you need? It probably preserved your brain, right? I don't think people …

Scott Hammond: [laughs] 'Cause at 25 your brain's all finally formed.

Kalea Renee: I think that [laughs] this is very distracting.

Scott Hammond: We're being distracted? Over my left shoulder. So you wish you would've tried some cannabis strains at a younger age?

Kalea Renee: I wish I'd had some OG Trainwreck that was from someone's parent that I

Scott Hammond: knew growing up because- What does OG mean?

Kalea Renee: It means it's an original, or, uh, original gangster is what OG means. But basically it's a strain that was developed and grown first in Humboldt County, and there are a lot of strains like that that now have become known across the country and- Yeah … dare I say even across the world. Because the cultivation, the techniques that people use, the passion that people put into growing cannabis in Humboldt, for whatever reason I think it's probably one of those places where the climate is really ideal for it. Okay. And so people do a lot of really fun, cool stuff. And if you smoke a lot of, a lot of weed, at first it's just like, oh, you smoke and you get high, and you feel a little fuzzy, and it's like, oh, woof, I might be couch locked. I might need to eat a lot of snacks. But if you use it more, and perhaps more than just as I wanna zone out and zonk off, like I've, I've realized in the last year or two ADHD to a certain degree. I'm on this neurodivergent kinda spectrum.

Scott Hammond: Wonder where you got that, Kalea. Yeah. I, I frickin' wonder, Dad.

Kalea Renee: I really do wonder. Did you just cuss again?

Scott Hammond: [laughs] I said frickin'. Oh, frickin'. Oh. [laughs] I thought, I thought that was what you said. I didn't. I d-

Kalea Renee: I'm trying to, uh, trying to refrain. But with that, so oftentimes my mind is going very, very quickly. So there are certain strains where if I am m- during the daytime needing to still be functional in a way that I need my brain to light up in these certain ways and I don't need to get sleepy, there are certain strains that can be very helpful for that. There are times where my mind is still going 1,000 miles a minute, need to go to sleep because I have nine hours in which to recharge my body and my brain and my soul. So the, the nuance of that, um, all that to say that there's a lot of really good weed Humboldt, and I wish I'd really- Yeah … gotten on that train when I was there. Funny, funny story. You're the third guest in a row,

Scott Hammond: uh, last one was Sheriff Billy Honsal that talked about, uh, talked about weed at length, and the other was my friend Michael Kraft, who's Papa and Barkley. And the fact is, um, it's part of the narrative, and right now that industry's really there's people that are in bad shape. Um-And according to the sheriff- That much for that … some people, some people are actually doing pretty good right now, sheriff. But having said all that, um,

Scott Hammond: I trust the market forces of capitalism, supply and demand and economy- You do … to weed it all out,

Kalea Renee: Oh, that's a fun idea. 'Cause there's people

Scott Hammond: There's people that are 10,000 growers, 1,000 are regulated. The other 9,000 are bootleggers.

Kalea Renee: Well, the other interesting thing that has happened in that industry, in So- I think it's up and down, but in Southern Oregon, where I live- Mm-hmm … is in the last four or five years, the cartel has gotten really heavily involved- Too bad … in cannabis.

Kalea Renee: And some friends of mine, neighbors of theirs, it's adjoining property. These folks-

Scott Hammond: Not the Colombian, not the Bulgarian, but the Mexican cartel.

Kalea Renee: This is the Mexican cartel. From Mexico. From the … From [laughs] yes. Yeah.

Kalea Renee: From Mexico. There was a couple who lived in a, an adjacent property to some friends of they had a big grow operation. They … Something went wrong. I don't know if their plants died but they and another couple went to flee in a U-Haul, and they got shot and killed about 45 minutes away from their property. And this I, this I read about online, and it

Kalea Renee: … directed or connected to it being

Kalea Renee: you don't, you don't screw with the cartel. You don't get money from the cartel pay them back. Oh. You don't grow plants for them.

Scott Hammond: Did you ever watch Murder Mountain? Is it called Ozarks? Yeah.

Kalea Renee: Murder Mountain was funny because on the one hand, I'm like- It's cool … this is tr- this is real in a way, but it's super sensationalized. It was, yeah, totally. If you're going up a mountain spotlights and dogs barking and big scary signs, don't go up that mountain. Go back to the Bay Area.

Scott Hammond: Go back to the Bay Area- Stop- … or to LA- … stealing weed …

Kalea Renee: and get the hell out. You will be shot. Stop thieving. You'll be murdered. And frankly, like- Yeah … if you're playing with that sort of fire, no one should ever be murdered, obviously. Mm-hmm.

Kalea Renee: But stop screwing around w- [laughs] with fire and dangerous people, you're young and dumb and have a bunch of money It's just, it's not good plans. I don't know.

Scott Hammond: It's in Laytonville, which is in Mendo County. Mm. And it's east of Laytonville. There's nothing out there other than farms and fences and gates, and you don't go out … There's no law. The sheriff dare not go out there.

Kalea Renee: It makes sense, yeah. And, um, it's lawless.

Scott Hammond: It's the, the Wild, Wild West, and you just don't do it.

Chris: The, the Fish and Game in that area have been militarized-

Scott Hammond: Mm-hmm Really?

Chris: … uh, due to,

Kalea Renee: um-

Scott Hammond: Fish and Game has been militarized?

Chris: Yeah, due to a lot of cartel grows where

Chris: using awful, awful, uh, insecticides and, and whatnot that are leaching into-

Scott Hammond: Oh, yeah

Chris: … creeks and killing unbelievable amounts of

Chris: and whatnot.

Scott Hammond: Right.

Chris: Um, so they've-

Scott Hammond: Not okay

Chris: … in many cases, in that area and others, uh, they've militarized the Fish and Game.

Scott Hammond: They have to. Yeah. They have to be weaponized. Oh, buckets.

Kalea Renee: Husband, Chris, who- So they, they, um- … does many things … uh, s- hey,

Scott Hammond: So, um, Callea's husband, Chris.

Kalea Renee: Love you, babe.

Scott Hammond: Love you, babe.

Chris: Hey, hey, hey.

Kalea Renee: You're the best. No, it's true. And,

Scott Hammond: said last week, he said, uh, you know, they get a lot of other agencies involved in these, these grow busts between Fish and

Scott Hammond: Wildlife, um, Water Quality Board.

Chris: These, these, the people that are out there in-

Scott Hammond: It's crazy

Chris: … remote areas.

Scott Hammond: Yeah. No, they, they … And, and they may not get them on marijuana they get them on destroying the environment charges, which is right on, It's not okay to tear up the land for any reason 'cause you're a greedy miner- No

Scott Hammond: … or a grower. I know. Anyway, so let's move on from growing.

Kalea Renee: I, I'll, I will allow it. You allow it. [laughs] It's my favorite thing to say to people when they suggest something.

Scott Hammond: So who were you, who were you at, like, 10? I don't know. 10, 12 years old.

Kalea Renee: I was just sort of, like, an awkward sort of feral kid with a bunch Mm-hmm … living on, uh, Dows Prairie Road. Mm-hmm. Remember reading lots of books. I remember we, uh, we raised rabbits, and- rabbits. We did have rabbits, and swing sets, and lots of just, like, times. Mm-hmm. Um, yeah, lots of just, I don't know, kind of free-range chicken living, Yeah, pretty simple. Yeah. I remember climbing up this one particular and, like, going up and reading there until I got hollered in

Scott Hammond: Yeah. Get in here for chores. Ah, so idyllic. Sure enough. How about- House to house clean up. [laughs] How about 15, 16, 17? Like, the homeschool socialization. There's guys now on the horizon.

Kalea Renee: Oh, I mean, still awkward as, as can be. I was very involved in karate at the time. Um- Oh …

Scott Hammond: was- Double black belt, I hear. Second degre- degree. It's a,

Kalea Renee: I went to Okinawa. I think that was around, actually around 15 or 16 Okinawa for 10 days. Japan? Okinawa, Japan- Oh … which is apparently the Hawaii of Japan, but it still was a fantastic experience. Toronagasama. Uh, I don't remember any Japanese at all. That's okay. [laughs] Ohayou gozaimasu. That means good morning. Tomo. Tomo. [laughs] Um, no, at 15, s- a, a little weird. Um, liked to play paintball in the woods with which means that meant that I was, uh, [laughs] basically the paintball flag. [laughs] They couldn't, they weren't supposed to shoot me 'cause I shuffled from one area to another. But it was very exciting to be involved. And also, what a cool thing to be able to, even if you're just getting shot at by your brother and his friends playing paintball- Yeah … to do that stuff out in the Redwood Forest. [laughs] Oh. Actually, I have a particularly beautiful memory I Arcata forest, which is right behind the college, there's this beautiful- It's beautiful, probably mile, mile and a half loop that is kind of higher up in this little c- ravine area. And I remember walking it on one of the few sunny days that used to happen. Again, apparently there are more now. Little resentful. There's many more.But walking just on this bare path in these redwood trees surrounded by ferns and hearing the most beautiful violin music happening. I heard a recorder.

Scott Hammond: Oh, you did? That's so cool. Tom played a recorder up there.

Kalea Renee: I heard somebody playing a recorder once.

Scott Hammond: [laughs] Oh, you did?

Kalea Renee: And, and I've heard bagpipes.

Scott Hammond: [gasps] You've heard b- I'm s- In the woods? I'm super jealous of your bagpipe experience.

Kalea Renee: In the redwoods.

Scott Hammond: Bagpipes? What? Ugh.

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: No, just like when you-

Kalea Renee: That sounds like magic.

Scott Hammond: Yeah. Yeah.

Kalea Renee: It's, it's all magic.

Scott Hammond: You hear this, this ethereal

Kalea Renee: beautiful string music coming out of nowhere. Huh. And just seeing the, the way the sunlight filters down through redwood trees specifically is, I think, its own special kind of magic. Mm-hmm. And you just see these direct sun beams through, you know, your horizon or whatever. Um, but yeah, and then I eventually kind of rounded, rounded this path and I just remember seeing this, this small-framed man, probably in his 30s, with a tarp and a bag or two, and he was just standing under this enormous tree- Hmm … and staring up into it and just playing his violin to this tree. Wow. And it's burned into my memory- Hmm … as just this quintessential, like, Humboldt Arcata moment. Mm-hmm. You don't get that stuff elsewhere. That's so- You might have that same, you know… You're not even gonna get the same field of vision with things, much less that sort of experience. Yeah. That sounds very much like my Mount Tabor, uh, grand piano at the top of the mountain moment. Mm-mm-hmm. Portland magic is real as well. Nice. Something about music and trees combined, or music and nature combined really-

Scott Hammond: Yeah, the cathedral- Oh … of the redwoods. Yeah. Yeah, we used to sing worship songs down in Yeah … Humboldt Redwoods. You wanna see God in whatever form-

Kalea Renee: and you'd go … you call God. "What's even going on, man?

Scott Hammond: The, the acoustics in this church are pretty darn good." Tell you what,

Kalea Renee: you go indoors to a building? Tell you what, how about 20? Who

Scott Hammond: You were at, going to Humboldt. [laughs] 20 was a mess. [laughs] Really? Tell us about your hot mess, please. No, this is the good part. Uh, tell you about my hot

Kalea Renee: mess.

Kalea Renee: Went from really, uh, connected to a religious ideology that felt less and less correct for me, went to college, found alcohol, which I still love very much, but one when you go from it being really demonized, which I don't blame, I don't blame you guys for. It can do a lot of damage. Right. And with alcoholic parents yours- [laughs] you, you and mom yourself, like, why it's like, "Let's just keep this thing away from,

Scott Hammond: You mean, we had alcoholic parents. Yeah, sorry, Dad. We were alcoholic at the time. [laughs] Let me clarify, my parents

Kalea Renee: alcoholics. They had parents who were alcoholics. My grandparents were alcoholics. [laughs] Oh, they were lecherous alcoholics. My parents, I remember you, Dad, uh, throwing away an O'Doul's when I was five years old because you were like, "This still is playing at beer

Scott Hammond: Well, your sister shamed me. [laughs] I mowed the lawn.

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: Is that Brie? Yeah, and I was drinking- Of course she did … I think it was an O'Doul's- Little asshole … that I was given.

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: It was ice cold. It was perfect. beer, fake beer. And sh- and I heard, heard this person staring at me behind me. [laughs]

Kalea Renee: [laughs] Heard?

Scott Hammond: I heard, I heard.

Kalea Renee: Heard this person staring at me.

Scott Hammond: I heard her looking at me and I said, "What do you want?" She goes, "What are you doing drinking that?" I go, "It's an O'Doul's. See the label? It's not, not alcohol." 0.0% alcohol,

Kalea Renee: child. And she pointed her finger

Scott Hammond: and very slowly said it this way, "Dad, you drinking O'Doul's is like a kid smoking a candy cigarette." Oh, burn. [hisses] I go, "What? Ki- What? How?" Feel the sizzle. Yes, you are. Oh, the burn. It's stuck and it's not gonna go away. And I took the beer on the grass- Oh, and you dumped it out … and I poured it out as an of- as a drink offering to the Lord. Yeah.

Kalea Renee: What do you do when your offspring calls you out?

Scott Hammond: You pour the beer out and you go-

Kalea Renee: Yeah

Scott Hammond: … "Shit, I wish I could've had a Heineken."

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: [laughs] You know? It's like I wish I had the- spiritual maturity to have, like, a- Proper beer at least … like, a full on- Shit … triple IPA hop venom from Oregon. [laughs] But I didn't know about this. So I poured the beer out and said, "Get out. Just get out of here." [laughs]

Chris: But for real, though, like, you're, healthy and loving and careful and, and you're looking out for your kids, and your kid, like, picks up on that and listens to you and is like, "Hey, aren't you not supposed to be doing this?"

Scott Hammond: Yeah, called out the old man.

Chris: Uh-

Scott Hammond: I, I think it's fair.

Kalea Renee: Oh, okay. Sorry. Aren't you playing at sin?

Kalea Renee: Oh.

Scott Hammond: I think-

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: I think I'm fair game at that point- [laughs] … to go, "Hey, um, if we're really accountable- [laughs] … and we're really transparent as a family and, and naturals."

Chris: I had no idea this is the mess of trying to be a parent,

Chris: a human-

Scott Hammond: [laughs]

Chris: … trying to raise little humans.

Scott Hammond: Yeah, you're gonna jack your kids up.

Kalea Renee: [laughs] And also exist as a human being.

Chris: And these little humans develop-

Scott Hammond: Be a human as well

Chris: … intelligent brains and start asking questions. You're like, "Hey."

Kalea Renee: Yeah. Little assholes.

Chris: "Can you cut it out, please?"

Scott Hammond: [laughs] So parenting is difficult in Humboldt and beyond. It turns out.

Kalea Renee: That is, I think, a universal concept. It turns out it's… Yeah.

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: You're, you're busy screwing up your kids, [laughs] And you're forgiven, and we love you. So 25, w- who were you at 25? You're gone from college.

Kalea Renee: Oh, 25 I was a full-blown workaholic.

Scott Hammond: Did you leave Humboldt by then? Yeah. Were you gone?

Kalea Renee: So I left Humboldt at, uh, just after 20. Um, my now ex-husband and I at the time, I'd met

Kalea Renee: him, oh, let's see, 10-ish months, uh, in my senior year of college. And when I was about to graduate, the choices that I felt were eitherThere was this- so I, I have a degree in music from Humboldt vocal performance, which is frankly not the most useful degree, was something I loved and it w- when I thought about perhaps I'll do communications so I'd be responsible, I'm like, this also is not a career track- Mm … major. So I might as well at least do the thing and that I love that's feeding my soul and making me happy. Mm-hmm.

Kalea Renee: So when I graduated, the two choices I felt were either move to LA to go to this, and thank God I didn't do this one- unaccredited musical theater college that had a poster of the 12 people who'd gone there and gone on to be on Broadway. Wow. However, there was more than 12 people who went to that school. And it was something like $50,000 for, again, an unaccredited master's program. So rather than doing that, $50,000, um, Jacob, my older brother, he and his wife lived in Medford in Southern Oregon. They'd paid for… They were, they'd bought a house their last month's rent. So they told me and my ex, "Hey, try this out," 'cause we'd visited a number of times and it was quite fun. Said, "Hey, you got a, you got a month free." Oh, yeah. Yeah. So did that. Uh, slept on an air mattress, found a place, and really kind of fell, fell in love with, with this area. A lot of it has to do with the weather. There are hot summers that get over 100 degrees. There is many lakes and things around. Winters occasionally you'll see snow. Mm. But the thing, the one thing that I could not… One of the things that prevents me from ever moving back to Humboldt and living there full time is that

Kalea Renee: cold, foggy weather. That is a requisite for all the beauty and the banana slugs and the redwood trees and all this amazing life that grows there, but it requires it to be cool and gray and foggy. I hate that. And I hate that.

Scott Hammond: This show is not 100% Rogue River or Medford- [laughs] Sorry … or Jackson or Josephine- [laughs] … or any other county in Southern Oregon. Humboldt's the best. It's 100% Humboldt. Banana slug. Stay on script. [laughs] Or- We love the fog. We love the fog. We love the fog. Fog

Kalea Renee: You can edit all the rest of the… You know what I miss about Humboldt so The fog. What's that? The fog, the snacks, the people, the, uh, the ease of transport from one town to Those, those highways are- Here's funny story … pretty, uh,

Scott Hammond: [laughs] When you have enough fog, when the sun comes out, it is magic. Appreciation. Appreciation. Oh. Appreciate. Gratitude and appreciation. Right, Joni? Yeah. Gratitude. The other thing I- Absolutely … you are- Contras … yeah. You're dead right, and the other wonderful thing about

Kalea Renee: you live right on the coast, you see all the fog, but inland, you can experience in Blue Lake 75-degree weather. That's eight minutes, yeah. That- that's so hot. So am I. [laughs] So- You go to Willow Creek, it's, it's 80 and you're going, "I'm dying."

Chris: Meanwhile, we're living in 100-degree weather on the right now. [laughs] Willow Creek will h- easily hit 100 in the summer.

Scott Hammond: Okay, weather casters. [laughs] Our weather forecast. Back, back to Khalia's story. No redwoods in Willow Creek, though.

Kalea Renee: That's true, but there is bodies of water you can get into Sure … of hypothermia within 30 seconds. So- Sneak your ways. It's all true.

Scott Hammond: You know, there, there is no perfect place, right? [laughs] If we, if we had it, we'd all live there.

Kalea Renee: You know what? I loved growing up in Humboldt. Humboldt is flawless, perfect very quickly. Oh, for sure. when you sit here, it… Now you're what? Are you 33?

Scott Hammond: Two?

Kalea Renee: 34. Oh, wow. I have you at 28 or 29. I've surpassed Jesus at this point.

Scott Hammond: Yes, you did, child. In age. Well done. I was pretty sure my life would end by the end- Well, no, you're- … the end of 33. … doing great. But we're still doing well, thank you. So what do you- Sorry to say you're not the prophet.

Kalea Renee: Well, 28 and 27 passed me by. [laughs] I was hoping 33 would have some but here we are, so I guess I get to keep living. Go on.

Scott Hammond: You're also amazing. So my question is: What, what are your hopes for Humboldt? As you look back and you still have friends there, like- Yeah …

Kalea Renee: you have Claire, and you have, um- Claire and Holly and- Holly and other… You have- Yeah … Mom and Dad. You have some,

Scott Hammond: I've got all, all, yeah, it's beautiful. Love Mikayla. Yeah. What do, what do you see for us,

Scott Hammond: um… I don't know. Uh, w- what would you like to see? I, what, what do you see in the county in terms of psychographic future, mojo, w- crystal ball? What, what do you, what do you envision? What would you like to see? What do you, what do you think's gonna happen?

Kalea Renee: You know, all I can do is boil this down to my, my small perspective of, of I don't, I don't really know. It's been about a dec- since I've lived there. But the thing that I really enjoy about going back to

Kalea Renee: Humboldt now is, my God, the food at, at the restaurants has gotten so much Yeah. There's been so much great- Shout out … restaurant and distillery and brewery growth. So up until recently, I worked in the bar and service industry for, uh, 11 or s- or so years. So that

Kalea Renee: kind of hospitality and that connection between people- Yeah … I really understand the power of. It's not just you go out and you have a nice meal and you go home. The thing that's beautiful about Humboldt is the breweries that have the food trucks connected, and you go there and I, I love food trucks. [laughs] I owned one for a little while. Um, it's a really amazing way for people who especially if you're talented and passionate about one certain type of

Kalea Renee: … that you can produce a, a four to six to maybe 10 item menu, find a place to park, and you can actually make a living. Because if you own your own bar or restaurant, your profit margin slim. Right. You have to have investors or backers or family money or a glut of your own money to do that. But I love food that is created by people who And I think what Humboldt has really, what the development that I've seen is people who-… are excellent at specific things- Mm … who are able to execute it, whether it's through food trucks or distilleries or breweries, because there's a lot of really special happens in Humboldt. Oh, yeah. Like the Oyster Fest. The Oyster Fest is something that I talk about a little too much. Like, all, and all of the, all [laughs] making lots of beers

Scott Hammond: Oyster Fest is just a, a thing. It's a big thing.

Kalea Renee: No, my favorite thing at the Oyster Fest I was helpi- I was working at some booth and we tent, so we were trading oysters for beer bands. And just like I got shwasted, and it was amazing. Aw, shucks. But [laughs] well, well, well. Well, well. Aw, shucks. Cheap joke. Can I pitch something in really quick?

Chris: I come from this, uh, small town area in southern, and like everything I've gathered from where you guys are from, you have it all. You guys really have it all there, but people really suck, really fucking, sorry, freaking suck at understanding what they have. And, uh, like where you guys are, there's tons of magic. There's t- like a really, really great climate overall.

Scott Hammond: Oh, yeah.

Chris: I mean, like y- you may not be that hot in the summer-

Scott Hammond: And it doesn't get that cold in the winter

Chris: … you're definitely not that cold in the winter-

Scott Hammond: 45 to 65

Chris: … because the winter can really suck where And like a, you have to bundle up and-

Scott Hammond: 22 degrees for five months

Chris: … wish you were dead sometimes here.

Scott Hammond: [laughs]

Chris: But go down to Humboldt and you're like, "Oh, wow. I, I'm wearing a tank top. This is nice."

Scott Hammond: Temperate and balmy. In February.

Chris: And, and you gu- you guys really-

Scott Hammond: In the winter

Kalea Renee: … do kinda have it all. Wait, wait. I'm sorry to interrupt. You know what you guys have that I didn't know,

Scott Hammond: This just in.

Kalea Renee: Sewer skunks. What?

Chris: Oh, biscuits.

Kalea Renee: Sewer skunks. We do have or don't have them?

Kalea Renee: Hold on. You have sewer skunks. [laughs] We have se-

Kalea Renee: you. When we were in town, Chris and I, over Christmas- Oh … the Christmas holidays, we went on a nice walk down to the beach.

Chris: [laughs]

Kalea Renee: We lit a fire on the beach safely and carefully. We- That's right … had a lovely time, and it was probably th- 2:30, 3:00 in the morning because we are a late night type of people, as we are walking back, and we… If you are familiar with Humboldt, you'll know the undeveloped business development area by the Eureka Arcata Airport in McKinleyville- Oh … where there is, I believe it's a Best Western Hotel. Yeah. [laughs] And it was, it, for years before I left it was, it it's going to be this magnificent cluster of businesses and such. It has not quite come to that fruition. We do have the federal court there now. [laughs] Thank you.

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: Don't you know? Thank you, Joni. You know what else you have in that

Kalea Renee: stretch of- Coast Guard … paved area? Sewer skunks. Sewer skunks.

Scott Hammond: Fucking- Oh, sewer skunks … sewer skunks. I'm sorry.

Kalea Renee: Wait, so you mean the freaking- Freaking sewer skunks. Freaking sewer skunks. So we were just on our merry way walking back to the Airbnb we were sharing with my lovely older brother Jesse, his wife Yoonjung, and as we are unobtrusively just walking down the s- the road near the sidewalk, out of one of the storm drains- Comes the s- … there comes a black and white- The rare sewer skunk … fluffle. And thank God Chris looks- Stinky von Stinky … sees, watches it turn and start to wiggle- Whoa … and he looks at me and he shouts, "Babe, run." Skunk. There was no context. Thank God we have a close relationship I just ran. Did you run? I, I freaking ran.

Chris: Ran immediately with like no pause whatsoever.

Scott Hammond: [laughs] That's awesome.

Chris: And I was, I was very proud because-

Kalea Renee: Maybe that was, maybe that was your conservative Christian homeschool

Scott Hammond: training. [laughs] You were trained well. You know what?

Kalea Renee: How to be a helpmeet worked. [laughs]

Chris: I was very proud because like I, I had seen this thing long before and I said-

Scott Hammond: Was it coming for you?

Chris: No, it, it, it, it-

Kalea Renee: It sprayed us, Dad

Chris: … observed us. It, um-

Kalea Renee: It sprayed us-

Chris: Oh

Kalea Renee: … and we were 20 feet away

Chris: … real, real quick though, like it observed us. It was like, "Huh, I don't like you. Uh, I'm gonna point my ass at you." that point I was like, "Okay, problem. We gotta run." And I was, I just said, "Run," and I looked at Kalea and she didn't pause, she didn't hesitate.

Scott Hammond: Good. Get out of there.

Chris: She just like started running, and I was like, "Babe, thank God."

Kalea Renee: I took off. Do not fight the skunk. So this is a unique experience that I have only had experienced in So- Okay … beware the sewer skunks at 3:00 AM.

Scott Hammond: Where were we before this? I have no idea.

Kalea Renee: [laughs] No idea. I'm… Y- you gotta- You gotta control the podcast, Abby …

Scott Hammond: you have me entr- entranced-

Kalea Renee: Get it together. Get it together

Scott Hammond: … on the sewer skunk thing. No, it was,

Kalea Renee: Yeah, the wonders of Humboldt. Oh, the wonders of Humboldt. Yeah. All the natural wonders of Humboldt. The Oyster Fest, the sewer skunks.

Scott Hammond: [laughs] Okay, so if you- Cypress, Cypress Grove … so you come to our place- Jewel Distillery.

Chris: Shout outs, Jewel Distillery. Shout out. Stuel?

Scott Hammond: Jewel Distillery. Jewel Distillery. Oh. Oh, Jewel. Big shout out.

Kalea Renee: Oh, big shout out. Also big shout out, Dick Taylor chocolates. Dick Taylor.

Chris: Holy crap. Shout out every podcast.

Kalea Renee: All the podcasts, Dick Taylor chocolate. Yeah. So- They're, they're doing fine.

Scott Hammond: You don't need to shout them out …

Kalea Renee: one wonderful thing that- They're wonderful … Joni Hammond, my mother, does for any birthday or Christmas or gift giving type time is she will give me a different sort of artisanal bar of Dick Taylor chocolate. Artisanal. Artisanal. I said artisanal? Artisanal. I don't…

Kalea Renee: Delicious.

Kalea Renee: Artisanal.

Scott Hammond: Delicious chocolate. Artis- Bergamot … whatever it is.

Kalea Renee: The thing I love about it is not only is the flavor unique and delicious, I remember there was a particular, it was like a bourbon barrel

Kalea Renee: aged orange-

Scott Hammond: Yes. Yes … oh, bucket. So good. Yes. We remember this.

Kalea Renee: I remember.

Scott Hammond: Yes. And the packaging- It's the best … is beautiful.

Kalea Renee: We gave it a six.

Scott Hammond: The packaging is beautiful. The imprint on the chocolate bars

Kalea Renee: Um, there's something about-The, when you have the full package of something that tastes beautiful, looks beautiful and you love and respect from whence it came- Yeah … it makes it taste just the most best. So, so Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs did an

Scott Hammond: years ago in their old facility and they, they stated it this way. So if you have a $500 bottle of scotch, it's the probably one of the best scotches- Mm … versus their super expensive chocolate at 10 bucks a bar, which is probably one of the best dark chocolate you can buy. Mm. That's a value. Oh, for sure. It's not 500 bucks 500… $5,000- No, why not? … bottle of collectible liquor, but it's, um, and they're great guys. So I have a q- so this is bonus round, bonus round time. Bonus round. Here we go. Ready? Where would you go if you got to go anywhere for dinner in Humboldt? Go.

Kalea Renee: Where is the places… [sighs] Larrupen. Larrupen. Definitely Larrupen. Larrupen. Oh. 10%. Bonus round number one. Number two, if you got to go on a hike for a whole

Scott Hammond: day and dri- driven there in a limo with a really nice

Kalea Renee: Lady Bird Johnson. Lady Bird Johnson Grove. Bing, bing.

Scott Hammond: Number three, where would you go for coffee?

Kalea Renee: I mean, Jitter Bean on the Plaza because it's the as far as I know. Okay. How about- It's really killer chocolate …

Scott Hammond: okay, number four … killer chocolate, I mean, coffee … what festival would you go to? Oyster Fest. Oyster Fest. Okay. Number five, where would you go for chocolate?

Kalea Renee: You know, probably Safeway 'cause M&Ms are kind of my favorite- [laughs] … and like Reese's are also tasty, so I feel like- Reese's? … the Reese's that have like the crunch that's like a wafer Kit Kat combo, be my jam. Oh. Gotcha. Gotcha. [laughs] Dick Taylor's natch.

Scott Hammond: [laughs] How about Mexican food? Oh, Rita's. Rita's. Yeah. Okay. Cool. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Good.

Kalea Renee: Great margaritas, great enormous burritos. Nice.

Scott Hammond: How about a, if you had to go out for beers?

Kalea Renee: You know, that would be a several way tie. Uh, Hum Brews in Arcata because they've got a taps from different spots in the county- Mm … and also really delicious pub fare. Or, ah, S- is it Sierra N- no, it's not Sierra. But oh my God, I'm embarrassing myself. It's Six Rivers. Not… Lost Coast.

Scott Hammond: Oh, you know what? Lost Coast maybe. I would go to Six Rivers- Six Rivers …

Kalea Renee: in McKinleyville because- Oh … they had this strawberry sour they'd had again. And then also Lost Coast, which I think actually a few years ago when I was back, they'd opened a beautiful new- Yeah, yeah, taproom, beer- On Broadway … spot. And also is it, uh, who is the, is it Duane, who is the artist who does all of their graphic? Duane Flatmo.

Scott Hammond: Duane Flatmo, thank you. He does all their labels, yeah. Yeah.

Kalea Renee: All the Duane Flatmo artistry. Oh, yeah. So it's, so great sweatshirts- People- …

Scott Hammond: and great beer … people know, um, what's it called? Great White? Lost Coast.

Kalea Renee: Great White. Great White. Great White. You know what's funny?

Chris: Great White's one of my favorites.

Scott Hammond: Yeah. It's got cardamom, which is a treat.

Kalea Renee: I remember when they have an orange, I don't remember what it's called, their orange infused ale. It's like wheat ale. Mm-hmm. Tangerine wheat. The tangerine wheat. Tangerine wheat. Tangerine wheat. I remember when that shit used to only be available at Wildberry's Market in Arcata in 22 ounce bottles before they started bottling it in standard bottle size and distributing it. Mm-hmm. Almost impossible to buy here.

Scott Hammond: Yeah. Really? And I remember when the six packs Oh, yeah. [sighs] Inflation is really a thing.

Kalea Renee: So we have a Grocery Outlet and it's, it can be found in Thailand.

Scott Hammond: It's a really- So it's, it's everywhere … it's a delicious beer. Why it's not here- I'm very happy it's gone,

Kalea Renee: echelons of the world because it should, but I remember when it was, you could only get that in a 22 because it was one of their new specialty things.

Scott Hammond: So let's bring it in. Okay. Can I talk for a quick second about

Kalea Renee: $6 Monday night, or actually I think it would have with their deli counter?

Scott Hammond: No. Fine.

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: The meatloaf was great. It was on Tuesdays. There, yeah, Came with mashed potatoes. So let's talk about your legacy. Okay. What do you want to, what's on your, what's on your tombstone?

Kalea Renee: Ooh.

Scott Hammond: I don't want a tombstone. I want to be cremated,

Kalea Renee: bunch of different places and be tattooed into a bunch of different they like me enough.

Scott Hammond: Okay. Fair.

Kalea Renee: I, I-

Scott Hammond: Good answer

Chris: … I think he's asking what, how,

Chris: life?

Kalea Renee: I know, but I was giving him a literal answer because-

Kalea Renee: I know

Kalea Renee: … he asked a literal question.

Chris: I thought you were evading-

Scott Hammond: So what-

Chris: … and I, I intercepted

Scott Hammond: … so that's a good one. So who are you?

Kalea Renee: [laughs]

Scott Hammond: I'll, I'll ask you the Grandpa Tom question.

Scott Hammond: Who are you and what do you want?

Kalea Renee: I'm someone who wants to live… I wanna live a life that's full, that's adventurous,

Kalea Renee: that

Kalea Renee: brings

Kalea Renee: joy and good life to other people, that appreciates myself and loves myself the most because whether selfish or not, no one else lives in my head. No one else knows me as well as I know me, and I think it's okay to just choose to be like, even if it's by a

Kalea Renee: fraction, I, I am my favorite person, and I have an incredible, an incredible group of friends. I have an incredible husband. I have incredible parents.

Kalea Renee: And

Kalea Renee: with the, the freedoms and the life that I am gifted to live, I just wanna make people happy and make people laugh. I think there is incredible value in laughter and in silliness and in fun, and in being connected to the earth and to other people- Mm-hmm … which is a bunch of different things, but I think for me, the most important thing is to make people feel seen, feel heard, feel recognized, and to make them laugh. And if they're laughing at me, that's also fine. I, I'll be the first to laugh at me- Mm-hmm … because I think there's a deep value in, in finding humor within yourself and at yourself. Mm-hmm. It's also a really good defense mechanism- Sure … if you're a little conscious. [laughs] But once you develop that out more, I mean-Just to make people feel like, hey, you're not, you're not alone, you're not

Kalea Renee: by yourself. I might not be the one who gives a shit about you, gives a shit about you. There could be. I mean, we're hopeful.

Scott Hammond: Fingers are crossed. Thinks you're beloved, redeemed, amazing, justified- But you know, I just- … forgiven …

Kalea Renee: I just wanna live a life that's, uh, that's, that's good to me and good to the people around me and good to… I, I wanna leave things a little better than It's like when you, when you go camping or you- Yeah … go to a beach. Like, you know, cart it in and cart it out and try to leave things a than- Mm-hmm … than you left them. And we've never done this before.

Scott Hammond: We're gonna say goodbye, but before we do, we would all, all of us here, would love you to perhaps sing us a little song. Don't cry for

Kalea Renee: me, Argentina. Ah. The truth is I never

Kalea Renee: left you. All through my wild days. My mad existence. I kept my promise. Don't keep your distance. Wait, can I do another one as well? Sure. Trailers for room or let.

Scott Hammond: Rooms to let for 50 cents. Rooms to let for 50 cents. Uh, no phone, no food, no pets. No phone, no food, no pets.

Kalea Renee: I ain't got no cigarettes. I ain't got no cigarettes. Come on. Old smokies I have found. Old smokies I have found. Short but not too big around. Short but not too big around.

Scott Hammond: I'm a man of means by no

Kalea Renee: means. I'm a man of means by no means.

Kalea Renee: I'm a king of the road. I'm a king of the

Scott Hammond: road. [clapping] Thanks for coming. Love you so much. Bless you. [kiss sound] Hey, thanks for listening today to 100% Humboldt. Reach back to us, follow us, share us. And thanks again to our guest. This is Scott Hammond, come back next time and learn what it 100% Humboldt.